Curious about BDSM, Kink, Bondage or Fetish?

Curious about BDSM, Kink, Bondage or Fetish? If you are interested in giving BDSM a try, there are a number of light BDSM practices that can be a good starting point for beginners trying it for the first time. This includes such things as:. Hair pulling. Blindfolds. Light spanking. Scarf or tie bondage. Roleplaying. For more intense forms of erotic play, you could take a class, read a book, or watch instructional videos. If you are anything like me, you may feel like you live in a shelter with no idea what the world of BDSM is and what is even involved. If this is the case, you have come to the right place. I will share with you what I have found about the whole topic of BDSM, Kink, Bondage, and also Fetishes. If you have come to this blog and are all in for this type of bedroom play, please leave us a comment below, we would love to know what happens behind closed doors, or open of that is what you are into.

Here's some basics

We have an impressive range of bondage, kink and fetish sex toys, from adult bed restraints, to swings, whips and paddles, there is some good stuff here to satisfy every desire and keep you sexually aroused for hours on end.

What is BDSM?

BDSM is an over arching term used today to refer to a range of consensual sexual roleplay or fetish activities including impact play, kink, bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism, sadomasochism, submission and domination, all for the ultimate goal of sexual gratification.

This usually involves an unequal distribution and/or movement of sexual power or power exchange, in a dominant and submissive manner. In this form of power play, the "dom" or dominant partner is the one who takes control, while the "sub" or submissive partner foregoes the responsibilities of control in order to "serve".

The books and subsequent movies around the theme Fifty Shades Of Grey provided a limited glimpse into BDSM, however if you are prepared to do your homework, you will find there are no wild secrets, and that there is so much more to this style of "kinky sex". 

BDSM is an umbrella term that refers to a spectrum of sexual behaviours and preferences, including a range of fetishes and fulfilment of sexual desires. In many cases, BDSM activities involve the use of various inanimate objects to complete a sexual fantasy. These can include adult bed restraints and other interesting restraints that restrict select parts of the body such as handcuffs, ropes, gags, blindfolds, swings, and spreader bars, as well as items that are designed to assert dominance such as whips, paddles, clamps, collars, and roleplay outfits and costumes.

The level to which people go to with BDSM play also varies considerably, from bedroom activities only between two consenting partners, through to regular multiple partner meetups and role play, all the way to fully immersed dominance and submission in every aspect of life, the latter being quite rare but possible. You may or may not be surprised to know that BDSM relationships are more common than you think, and there is quite a large BDSM community here in Australia, you just have to know where to look. Additionally, it's important to note that both partners must consent to this dominant-submissive roleplay, making it different than a sexual assault. In fact, a common phrase used in the BDSM community is "safe, sane, and consensual" or SSC, reinforcing that any type of play must be all three.

Some Of The Most Common Forms Of Fetishism

Dom / Sub

Essentially a role play where one partner takes the dominant role, and the other a submissive role. The "dom" or "master" directs the scenarios to which the "sub", "slave" or submissive role obeys.

Although this sounds very one sided, it can actually be misleading, as the dom is required to be responsible for the direction, activity and participation in any role play, it could be considered that the dom is in fact serving the sub by taking this responsibility. Either way, a dom / sub relationship can work very well for those willing to participate.

Impact Play / Fetish

Impact play is the use of force for the purpose of subjecting someone to a consensual "impact", whether it be spanking with a hand, paddle, whip or the like. It is important for you and your partner to understand the acceptable and permitted level of impact prior to commencing this type of fetish play.

Role Play / Fetish

Role play is acting out a sexual fantasy. There's nothing wrong with wanting to do that, if it gives you sexual pleasure and your partner is a willing participate. The role play options are limitless, and Bed Buddies has a range of costumes to help enact your fantasy, as can be seen in our costumes section.

Foot Fetish

A very common fetish, it involves the adoration and worship of feet, although fetishes can essentially focus on any body parts. Even just the act of touching, massaging, smelling and kissing can be enough to send your foot fetish connoisseur into heaven.

Anal Sex

Once considered a taboo, anal sex has in recent years become more popular, particularly with heterosexual couples, and opened up a range of fetish scenarios and options for the kinksters out there. Bed Buddies has an extensive range of toys in this genre. Take your time to investigate our range of anal devices.

Sensory Deprivation / Fetish

The addition or removal of stimuli can help some people attain a level of sexual arousal that they need to be able to achieve an orgasm. Removing sight via use of a blindfold, hood or mask is one such example, as it tends to heighten other senses such as sound and smell.

Bondage / Restraints /Handcuffs

Bondage is the act of restraining someone for the purpose of power exchange in a dominant / submissive context. This is one of the more common forms of BDSM, however it can be quite complex, with the development of techniques such as shibari bondage rope tying. 

Kink Community

There is a whole kink community just waiting to be found, including both exhibitionists and voyeurs. One of the most popular websites for Kink is Fetlife. This site is for beginners and seasoned experts alike, and provides a safe environment with regular social meetups to become comfortable with moving slow to enthusiastic consent. If Kink interests you, sign up and have a look around. You can take as long as you like to get comfortable with the kink goings on in the community, or if you decide sexual fetishism is not your thing, just delete your account.

Communication Is Key

Most people find their comfort zone and preferred fetish within the realm of Kink, all the while remembering that communication is paramount to sustaining a good healthy relationship.

This includes the use of a safe word, which in effect is a STOP or a NO alternative. Some people use a traffic light system, green for go, orange or amber for caution, and red for stop.

Given that sometimes the role play may include these words as part of the roleplay. a safe word is generally a random word that instructs either party that the person using the safe word does not wish to proceed down the current path. The term could be anything from an inanimate object such as a lamp, to a persons name. Be sure to ascertain a mutually understood safe word before proceeding.

AfterCare

It is important, and good sexual practice and sexual health and wellness, whenever undertaking sexual activity that includes BDSM, Kink, Bondage and Fetishism, to spend some time afterwards making sure both parties are able to share and communicate their experiences in an open and honest way, and to relax from the heightened state of sexual arousal to a more calm and normal state. Sharing this with your partner is a good idea, as it helps both of you understand and communicate your boundaries and preferences in your sexual behaviour and use of accessories.

Is Kink And BDSM For Everyone?

Possibly not, as BDSM definitely a unique form of human sexuality, however if you have a look through our range and something catches your eye, then maybe dipping your toe in the BDSM pond may be worth a try.

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